Friday, February 13, 2009

Have More Family Fun On Less Money

Frequently, I ask children what fun things they like to do with their parents. Contrary to what you might think, they don’t list fancy vacations or shopping trips. The majority of answers I’ve received have to do with how it feels hanging out with parents. If parents are in a good and happy mood—the kids can enjoy anything—no matter how small. What children describe as fun and happy are the simple moments when the family is laughing and enjoying each other. Here are simple ways to create more family fun

Step1
Be assured that your children want to hang out with you. Regardless of how much money you spend, children can have a good time. Don’t freak out because you have less to spend on entertainment or eating out. Kids don’t need stuff to enjoy life. Kids are inventive. They can turn a stick into a wand and a rope into a swing. If parents are smiling and getting a kick out of the kids, the kids will happily improvise. You can learn about enjoying less from watching how kids do it.

Step2
Know that good memories are made in tight times. Yes, we want to give our kids the world, but when you think about what is important, it is the quality of connection between you that matters. If there are any positive outcomes to the financial woes most family are experiencing, it’s that the family will pull together. When you think back to your childhood, what are your favorite memories? Chances are you can’t remember the stuff as much as you remember how it felt to be together. Good feelings are the best gift.

Step3
Hold a family meeting. Give age appropriate information about why you have to tighten the spending. Kids sense when something is wrong, so it’s best to be honest. Be honest, but don’t give so much information that you scare them. Tell them finances are tight for everyone. Tell them that you have to cut down. Reassure them that there are ways to have fun spending less.

Step4
Talk about the entertainment budget weekly. Talk about the budget in terms the kids can understand. For example, maybe you ate fast food once a week and now you have to cut back to once a month. Maybe you have to pack snacks to the ballgame instead of buying at the concession stand. Let the kids know what to expect in advance.

Step5
When the kids ask, “Can I have that?” Instead of flatly saying, “we can’t afford that,” soften the blow with “Let’s figure out how we can save for that.”

Step6
Make the family motto: "Save a little, spend a little."

Step7
Brainstorm activities. A family I know in Seattle keeps an ongoing list of activities that are free or inexpensive. One Saturday they rode the city bus to Greenlake from Ballard. They took their bikes on the bus too. The following week at school, the kids bragged about the adventure so much that the following Saturday two schoolmates begged to come along.

Step8
Discover old-fashioned games. Teach your kids to play marbles, jacks or pick-up sticks. Play kick the can and hide-and-seek. Organize scavenger hunts. Invite friends and neighbors.

Step9
Think outside the shopping mall. Do art projects, have music night, listen to books on tape or read out loud, make gifts. Plan a neighborhood parade. Go to the library. Cook together. Grow a garden. Make a list of your city parks and visit all of them. Go to high school sporting events.

Step10
Emphasize the joy of pulling together. While discussing the budget and ways to cut back spending, be sure to emphasize the joy of pulling together. Say to your children, “We’re a rich family. Maybe poor in money, but we're rich in love."

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